Letting Go...

I don't think I ever quite gave myself time to grieve entirely for my Mom. We were so busy with the holidays and then getting M ready for his trip... I kinda let it go, cried and then picked up and moved forward. It's worked so far, but we are approaching the last time I last saw my Mom. And lately I have found myself really hurting and missing her. It's mainly been when others tell me about their parents, and not to brag, my Mom was the most awesome person to turn to. So it hurts to hear when others are enjoying their family.

Anyway... My cousin sent me this last night in an e-mail. It's ironic because I had just whispered to myself how much I loved and missed my Mom. It was ALMOST like she heard me and was whispering back... Here is what the e-mail said:

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport. They had announced the departure. Standing near the security gate, they hugged, and the mother said, 'I love you, and I pray you enough.'
The daughter replied, 'Mom, our life together has been more than enough... Your love is all I ever needed. I pray you enough, too, Mom.'
They kissed, and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I was seated. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy, but she welcomed me in by asking, 'Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?'
Yes, I have,' I replied. 'Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?'
'Well...I'm not as young as I once was, she lives so far away & has her own busy life. I have some challenges ahead, and the reality is - her next trip back will be for my funeral,' she said.
'When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, 'I pray you enough.' May I ask what that means?'
She began to smile.. 'That's a prayer that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.' She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail, and she smiled even more. 'When we said, 'I pray you enough,' we wanted the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.'
Then, turning toward me, she shared the following as if she were reciting it from memory.
I pray you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.
I pray you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more.
I pray you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.
I pray you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.
I pray you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I pray you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I pray you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye..
Then, she began to cry, and walked away.

They say, it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire life to forget them.

This is how my Mom and I said good bye on our last visit. When we said good bye we knew it would be our last time together. She prayed this for our family... I know that she heard me last night... My Mom has been hearing me every night!!! I miss you, Mom.

Not Perfect, but Good Enough! :)

This was THE weekend for the pumpkin patch!!! I have been waiting for this like a child waits for Christmas since mid September! Every weekend was sickness or wet weather. :( Well, we did it!! We made it!!! One and a half hours and we were in the land of the pumpkins!

I guess everyone else felt the same way. :( This was drastically disappointing. M, the boys and I LOVE the pumpkin patch, but this year we had to share our beautiful farm with others... Lots of others! The kids had fun though. B was able to race in the kids' maze which was lush and green from all of our rain. C was forced to paint pumpkins which he felt was "boring," but participated for the sake of his brother... Go C! I think part of the lack of flair was missing M this year. He wasn't able to join us, but we had fun!!!

So I'm sharing the pictures with you!! Enjoy!!







I'm off to shower I swear I smell like a horse... I wasn't even around a horse. Could it be the hay? Anyway... Happy Fall Ya'll! :)

Professors are NOT HOT!

I like my Biology teacher. He knows his stuff and he knows how to teach it! He cares about his students because he gives an outline at the beginning of the semester to help guide us through the course. It works! I don't spend the entire lecture trying to capture every single sentence he says or try to figure out what is important and what is not. If you have a question, he's never made anyone feel stupid... He just simply answers the question. I like this kind of teaching! It's a vast contrast to sitting in freshman Chemistry with over 300 students which is what I did in my first undergrad.

Anyway... Some of my friend in class told me about this website. It tells you about professors at different schools. I checked it out. I'm stuck with my professors this semester, but it is nice to know if they are thought highly of. So I checked out my professors and next to Biology teacher's name is a hot chili pepper. I was impressed... I actually picked a good teacher or so I thought....

It appears that the hot chili pepper does not mean that the teacher is in demand (or maybe it does?) It appears it means he is sexy... Or HOT! Errr... NOT what I would have thought!!! Don't get me wrong, the man isn't Igore. He's a man in his mid forties, and just imagine your favorite high school Science, Math or History teacher, and you have my Biology teacher.

So... This "new" image of my unseemingly knowing professor has had an impact on me. It's awefully hard to look someone in their eye when you KNOW that some students (that may be in your class, or even your lab partner) lust after this man. And OMG, what if he has had an affair with one of his students??? It isn't entirely off the beaten track... He isn't Igore and we have some pretty lusty girls, and we live near a base with deployed husbands?? Today my lab partner (who as far as I know doesn't lust after the professor) and I reverted back to HS and wondered if he knew that he was a hot ticket, or if we should let him in our new found piece of info. But alas, we acted like school girls and simply giggled if he came near out table... I'm sure we will answer for that in our next test, but oh well... Professors are NOT meant to be HOT!!!!

Ah now that is more like it...

I have overhauled the blog. I like it, but stay tuned because I'm still not completely happy with it! :)

I hope to post some pictures here of the boys in the their Halloween costumes... B freaks me out this year... He seriously looks like Anakin. It kinda gives me the heebie jeebies, but he is happy. C is a GI Joe... Well from the year 2100... Ha Ha Ha. Well stay tuned! :)

More Random Dozen :o)

1. On an average, how often do you splurge and buy something for yourself?
Oh these days I do it pretty liberally. YIKES! I admitted that and M will more than likely read this... I call it shop therapy and well it isn't like I'm buying a new car! :)

2. What is the last creative project you began/finished? Feel free to post a pic of it. OH... IDK... Let's see... Maybe this??? And this is only one itty bitty part of the masterpiece! BTW, we rented he beautiful house by the sea! :)



3. OK, Goldie Locks, do you consider your house too big, too little or juuuust right? I'm happy with it, so just right. :)

4. What is your favorite outdoor chore? Oh painful to say I like to plant flowers!!! And weed them too. I have a knack for it and really like it!

5. If you knew that cigarette smoking was not bad for your health but would be a weight loss tool, would you use it? Why or why not? Oh... This is a tough one! Yes. I mean you could substitute a straw for a cigarette... I believe in diet and exercise, but I really could use the help for the few extra pounds. This is not a nice question!

6. On a road trip, would you rather drive or ride? RIDE!!! I love to look around and explore!

7. What do you consider a trivial pursuit? Like the game? Oh no... I don't know really.

8. So ... how long do you watch a movie or read a book before giving up on it? I don't know really... Just depends on how bad it really got. I like to TRY to give the benefit of the doubt, but hey... You never know???

9. Is there a song that you really love but are embarrassed to admit because it's not cool or it's racy or because it's by Hall and Oates? Oh no here I go... I admit, I like the Wiggles. Okay it is out! I have been know it OCCASIONALLY listen to them without the kids in the car.:-O

10. On a scale of 1-10 (10 = extremely) how spontaneous are you? NOT VERY! Yeah, I'm a planner... Spontaneity is NOT really in my vocabulary!

11. Are you a food and/or beverage snob? I don't think so... I like most food and beverages! :)

12. Who/What are you trying to control in your life? Ha Ha Ha... What can I control??? No seriously.. I'm not really trying to control anything, but manage the balancing act of Life. Kids, husband, school, self, house, chores... Yep. I'm like everyone else... Not really trying to control, just manage!!!

OK OK... I'm addicted to the Random Dozen... I really need to get back to studying!!! Adios for now! :)

Random Dozen

OK, so sue me... I am stuck at home with a sick child and it's raining outside. I'm sleep deprived, hungry, and need to be studying for a test I have on Wednesday... So I was surfing the net for recipes and came across this! It looks like fun, so hey, why not try it!!! What a great blog too!!! Hope you are all well!!!

1. Tell me the absolute best way to watch a movie.
In my bedroom with the surround sound... Some how this reminds me of the movie theater, but I can be in my jammies! :)

2. Do you ever think about your own funeral? If so, do you have specific ideas about how you would like it to be? Oh course! I'm a planner. I want to make it as easy as possible for my family. My Mom did a really great job putting everything together, and it made it relatively easy for me to find everything and get everything together. I hope I never have to do this anytime soon though!!!!

3. Are you more of a giver or a taker? Some how I'd like to think I'm a balance of the two, but goodness knows balance is not always available... I think I'm a giver for the most part. I like to give. It makes me feel good. This often leads people to take advantage of me though and then my feelings get hurt especially if I'm unable to give in a way they want me to.

4. Vacations: planned activities and schedules, or play it by ear? I AM A PLANNER!!! Enough said!!! Right, M???

5. What is one often overlooked item in your home that needs to be cleaned regularly? Ohh... Good question... YIKES! These days many things have been overlooked b/c I have just been plain busy with school, kids and the computer... Let me see... One thing (without be gross. No, I'm kidding)... Hmmm... I'd say the refrigerator handles. Those handles should be cleaned REGULARLY, but I admit... I don't often clean the handles. Did I mention I have boys... Bleck!

6. Name a cause that means a lot to you. American Cancer Society, Fisher House, Wounded Warrior... Yes, that is 3, but these are causes that mean a lot to me

7. Do you eat a regular old peanut butter jelly sandwich, or do you customize it? And by the way, jelly or no jelly? Just plain... I love PB&J on the beach!!! What great memories!

8. If we were having a conversation in person, how would I know if you were nervous? Body language can tell you alot... Also, someone who smiles a lot is either thinking hurry up or yeah... this is uncomfortable.

9. Do you have an elaborate bedtime routine, or just the basics of tooth brushing and jammies? I have a routine... Whether it is elaborate or not is purely up to the reader... My routine usually consisted of, jammies, tooth brush, kiss kids and say a prayer for them, read my daily devotion (if I have enough time I will check out the recommended verses), say prayers and then lights out! Maybe that is elaborate... It seems like alot!

10. Have you ever regretted something you wrote on your blog? Ohh.. Yeah... Nope! I like to write my feelings out, but if I think it might really hurt someone, I usually keep it in drafts, but never publish it.

11. Has anyone ever told you that you look like a famous person or celebrity? Did you agree? Nope. I think I told my DH I looked like Alyssa Milano... Ha Ha Ha... Hey, I got my catch! :)

12. If you were going to dedicate a song to a loved one or friend, what would the song be and to whom would it be dedicated? This is tough... I'm not good with song titles, but dozens of songs remind me of various people. I think I'd dedicate, " Remember When" by Alan Jackson to my husband. "The Glory of Love" by Bette Midler to my friend Renee.


Okay, you are spared... not more blogging for now... I'm trying to make up for a whole month of nothing... LOL. May you all be having a wonderful day!!!

Now wait a miute... Where did September go?

Somehow I managed to not blog for an entire month! Wow! I have been on a whirl a wind since our return from Virgina. Wow! But I can't believe I haven't written at least some thoughts down... I think maybe I have, but then decided it might not be a good idea to post for whatever reason.

But here I am on October 2nd posting. :) I don't really have anything profound to talk about today so let's do a 5 for Friday... I haven't done one of those in awhile. :) Let's make the theme FALL:

Number 5: This is what I'd like to be seeing at this time of the year. I have to admit our house in VA used to sit up from the lake and we had a beautiful view of the glassy water and the leaves turning. I miss sitting at the computer and looking out to see this: Montclair

Number 4: I don't want to see this any more!!! LOL


or this for that matter:



Okay, so this is okay... I won't show others the yucky that I had to witness... Well it wasn't the brain... It was the sound the brain made when it was removed.

Number 3: I miss this, and wish time would go by faster so that summer would come and we could visit again...

Good friends last a life time! I miss you, Nay!

Number 2: How do you make a smell on a blog??? I love the smell of pumpkin muffins, bread and apple spice!!! Yum!!

Number 1: Life is good!! Of course we should have all be in long sleeves and jackets!!! Ha Ha HA....



HAPPY OCTOBER YA'LL!!! :)